the light switch is ON. open - someone needs to extract the juice.

the Dicks (430 pounds) vs Scotty Charisma and Fred Sampson (398 pounds, already in the ring) - Your ref is Nick. Josh: "The Dicks are looking to make an impact!" Wrong show. Steve Romero calls the Dicks out as a horrible dated gimmick and look. The longer they dance, the less I have to type. Nick has to clean up the ring. Fred and One Of Them to start. Scotty Charisma is clapping for his partner, and no one in the arena is making any other noise at all. It's fabulously quiet. Chad with a waistlock, and takes down Fred. And again. And again. Smashing his face into the mat. Tag to James. Right hands. Whip, head down too soon, and Fred kicks it. Tag to Charisma, who walks right into a dropkick. Tag to Chad. Announcers are really quiet and aren't hyping anything. Double knee to the midsection, double shove down. One two no. Tag to James. Kick. Snap suplex, float over, then an elbow drop anyway one two no. Front facelock, tag to Chad. Kicks, forearms. Neck vice. Crowd clapping because they're bored. Scotty slowly moving to his corner, so Chad lets go, socks Fred, and forearms down Scotty. Now they're finally hyping Lashley, for lack of anything else to do. Chad whips Scotty into a James clothesline while Nick is corralling Fred. Front facelock, tag to James. Double dropkick, which actually allows Scotty to tag out. Fred comes in with a double clothesline, but it's ducked and he takes a double spinebuster (Romero: "bodyslam!") Chad leaves so he can be tagged in, and there's another double spinebuster. One two no. Tag to James, double spinebuster a third time. Scotty comes in, double spinebuster for him too. There's the face first Samoan powerbomb, and they're not done? Oh, right, Veg-a-matic. (4:09) Lots of hugging.

Jamie Noble (Hanover, WV, 202 pounds) vs Scotty 2 Hotty (Westbrook, ME, 208 pounds) - Annoying Byte This promo here. Your ref is Charles. Circle. Noble with a quick takedown, cover for one. Noble talking trash. Lockup, hammerlock, Noble with a snap mare, cover for one. Scotty chant, which offends Jamie greatly. Noble invites Scotty into the center of the ring, so he can lockup and knee him. Right hand. Whip, reversed, Jamie over, and into a hiptoss, and another, and a bodyslam. Right. Whip, reversed, Noble throws Scotty, but Scotty just tangles himself into the ropes. Back with a slap to the fight, right, whip, head down too soon, Jamie with a head smash on his knee, and then throws Scotty into the post. Armbar, forearms, elbow to the shoulder, sit on the shoulder. Hammerlock around the top rope, and then a dropkick to that left shoulder. Noble takes him down and puts on an armbar. SCOTTY SCOTTY SCOTTY. Legdrop on the arm. Both men up, and Scotty gets an atomic drop., off the ropes, into a Noble leg lariat. One two NO. Noble sitting on the left arm. Forearm to the arm. Wristlock on the leg arm. Scotty battling up, whips Noble, but takes a shoulderblock. Off the ropes, elbow drop, but no one's home. Scotty with a big slap, whip, reversed, Noble with a kick, Northern Lights Suplex, one, float over into a cross armbreaker! Scotty's in trouble, but he's able to quickly turn onto his stomach. He's. a little short of the ropes and in pain, but Noble lets go to stomp some more. Scotty rolls out to the apron, and Noble takes time to yell. Scotty's picked up - bottom rope suplex? No. Middle rope suplex? Scotty blocking it, forearming, and shoving Noble off. Scotty still on the apron, shoulder to the midsection, slingshot roll in over Noble's back. Clothesline, clothesline, back elbow, waiting for Noble to get up. Superkick caught, Noble misses a clothesline, and Scotty hits the superkick on the second try, one two foot on the rope! Scotty small package one t-no. Scotty with a big right. Turnbuckle smash. Corner whip, reversed, Noble charges into a boot. He's in position. Scotty realizes it. Off the ropes, two handed bulldog is reversed into the fireman's carry into double knee gutbuster. Dragon Sleeper, bodyscissors, it's over. (7:11) No worm for you. No worm for anyone.

Lashley (Colorado Springs, CO, 274 pounds) vs Havoc (250 pounds, already in the ring) - Your ref is Chris Kay. Lockup, Lashley throws down Havoc. And again. Turnbuckle smash, ad again, and again. Corner whip, Lashley runs in fast, but Havoc moves out of the ring. Right hands have no effect, and Lashley back heel trips him down. Lashley waits for Havoc to get up, and rams him into the corner. Shoulders to the midsection. Havoc tosses. Lashley waiting again, and clotheslines Havoc down. Belly to belly suplex. Lashley is pumped. Lift, and a slow looking Dominator. (1:52)

Cage Title match. Check out the logo on "2". (2:20)

Super Crazy & Psicosis (412 pounds) vs Vito & Nunzio (420 pounds) - The Juan Deeres seem a bit slower than usual this week. Crazy and Psicosis not so much. FBI push their way pass the Mexicools to pose in the corners. One guy chants ECW. Actually, it catches on. Psi and Vito to start. Vito with a headlock, cranking it in. Shot off, back with a shoulderblock. Vito off the ropes, over, under, hiptoss by Psi, armdrag. Armbar, tag to Crazy, top rope axhandle. Cranking the arm. Vito gets in a knee and tags Nunzio. Nunzio charges right into an armdrag. Crowd is quiet. Crazy waves in his partner without at tag. Whip, double pump powerbomb, moonsault/legdrop combo! One two Vito breaks it up. Jimmy Korderas barely has control of this match. Whip, Vito makes the blind tag, Crazy misses a clothesline, Nunzio grabs the ropes, and Vito punches Crazy as he turns around. Mounted punches as Nunzio rolls out. Vito's happy with himself. Scoop, slam, double jump pump splash one - no, Crazy's rolled on to his side, so not count. Tag to Nunzio, whip, Vito boot to the midsection, Nunzio swinging neckbreaker one two Psicosis breaks it up. Mounted punches from Crazy too. Psicosis clapping for his guy, as Nunzio slams him, drop the knee pad, and drops the knee. Chinlock. Crazy pounding the mat, and the crowd rallying for him. Elbows , but Nunzio stops that with a forearm to the back. Tag to Vito, headbutt to Crazy's side. Scoop, Crazy lands on top, one two no. Vito pounds Crazy with forearms for trying such a thing. Cranking Crazy's head, and elbowing him in the forehead. Scoop, slam. Vito dancing? I don't know what that is, but he's backing up, and then running forward with a legdrop on two no. Forearms. Arm spin takedown, tag to Nunzio, Nunzio lands the square dropkick to the face. Chinlock. Crazy rallying up with crazy punches, but the ref gets distracted by Psicosis' complaints and Vito slips in again. Double whip, double head down too soon and kicks to both. Big spinning DDT for Nunzio with a kick for Vito in the process. Can he make the tag to Psicosis? YES!  Wheel kick for Vito, wheel kick for Nunzio, backdrop for Vito, back elbow for Nunzio, running neck snap for Nunzio by Crazy, double faceslam for Nunzio one two Vito breaks it up. This isn't bad. Vito throws Crazy out, but Crazy holds out of the ropes and swings back in, and dropkicks Vito out. Crazy out after him with a pescado, and the legal men are left in the ring. Nunzio gets in a kick to the midsection, slam, Psi slips behind, charges, Nunzio with a tilt-a-whirl but Psi reverses to a small package one two THREE. (6:01) Romero is blown away by these two.

That's it.