tv pg v - only V? - cc entertainment open fireworks

Scotty 2 Hotty (Westbrook, ME, 217 pounds) vs Jamie Noble (Hanover, WV, 200 pounds) -  Josh is back, and subdued. Josh: "I hope that Heidenreich doesn't come anywhere near Velocity." Yea, me too. Talk about Chavo. Circle, with Scotty doing his wacky strut. Circle. Lockup, Hammerlock by Noble, snap mare by Jamie, cover, out at one. "HOW'S SCOTTY NOW?" I think that's what he said. Circle. Lockup, headlock takedown, Scotty headscissors reversal, Noble kip sup and out, armdrag, pose. Bill: "It seems like anyone who sits next to me is getting taken out." Josh says Heidenreich was looking for revenge based on what Cole said last week on Velocity. "Some people said [Cole] went too far, but we'll leave that one alone." Jamie informs Scotty that he's not on Noble's level. Noble with a kick, right, elbow, whip, head down, Scotty with a kick, clothesline, dropkick and Scotty's pumped while Noble slides to the floor. Jamie recovering, Scotty slides out after him, Jamie brought back in, Scotty back in, Jamie gives him a knee lift. Right hand. Back suplex, Scotty flips out, back suplex of his own. One two no. Bill: "Everywhere SmackDown! goes, all over the world, we're selling out." Scotty notices Jamie is in position, off the ropes, two handed bulldog caught and turned into a swinging neckbreaker one two NO. Josh: "I would right now like to think Lindsay Lohan for all her well wishes while I was out injured. I really appreciate the phone calls, the e-mails, the visits over to my house, thank you Lindsay Lohan." Bill: "You realize you have a concussion, right?" Noble kicks Scotty down in the corner, short clothesline. One two no. Josh: "Lindsay Lohan did come over!" Bill: "That was Meredith from Production." "That was Lindsay Lohan!" "That was Meredith." "Whatever you say Bill. I'd also like to think President Bush, for calling me this past Thursday before he spoke at the Republican National Convention." Choke on the ropes. Scotty tries fighting back and gets an eye rake. Chop. Suplex, one two NO. Front facelock. Maybe a neck vice Josh says he turned down the offer of Secret Service backup. "I don't think it's necessary." "Yea, that's because you never answer your phone." Oooooh, inside. Scotty rallies back, right, right, Jamie with shots to the neck. Legdrop, one two NO. Straight jacket chinlock. Bill: "The pressure on both sides of Scotty's neck is taking away the pressure to the brain - which I think you've lost - and is not allowing Scotty to take that breath he needs to stay alive." Scotty rallies up, running, and dropping down to run Jamie into the turnbuckle. Scotty with a right hand, back elbow, Jamie right block, Scotty back with a right, right, whip, backdrop. Looking at the crowd. For a while. Ah, he thinks it's time - off the ropes, two handed bulldog works. W O R M (Bill, during his usual anti-WORM rant: "This a whole bunch of people spelling three letters, uh, four letters") woo woo woo who who who HA. One two Jamie grabs the bottom rope. Scotty discusses the concept with Korderas, and brings Jamie in off the apron with a suplex. Noble lands behind with a waistlock, Scotty with a back elbow to get free, superkick caught, Noble kick, Tiger Driver blocked with a double leg takedown, Scotty jacknife cover, Noble rolls through, sits down on top, grabs the top rope for leverage, one two three. (6:27)

Two Weeks Ago: Can Heidenreich live up to the hype? At least Josh wasn't hurt by his words. (Just by everything else.)

Your announcers are Bill and Josh (w/neck brace). Bill: "Watching that back, I can't say what happened to you was NECESSARILY justified [camera switch to Josh staring daggers at Bill], but you had to know going into that ring, with Paul Heyman and his new found machine, you didn't belong there, you shouldn't have asked the questions you asked, and this is what happens." "Bill, I was in the ring, doing my job. This is something that I never ever thought would happen, that reckless animal, that monster Heidenreich, he took advantage of me." "Your job is right here with me, calling the shots in the ring, not in the ring asking them what they're about. Not justified, you don't belong in the ring." "Like I said, Heidenreich took advantage of me, I've never felt so helpless in my entire life, but we need to move on."

Tonight: Spike Dudley (c) vs Funaki for the WWE Cruiserweight Championship

SmackDown in Australia (1:02)
Eddie vs Kurt Angle, 2 out of 3 falls. We see the first two fall finishes, then skip ahead to Luther getting involved. (4:06)

SmackDown! Throwback: Chuck and Billy's Wedding (09/12/02). Hey, Stephanie! Hey, Jamal! (1:08)
Josh: Two guys getting married on SmackDown!
Bill: [sarcastic] What a shock, someone in a mask.

Luther Reigns (Phoenix, AZ, 290 pounds) vs Mike Kurkhart (Davis, CA, 235 pounds, already in the ring) - Bill explains his comment: "Everyone on RAW is twofaced." Maybe explains is too strong of a word. Josh: "I agree with everything you say, Bill." Bill: "Okay. I disagree, but okay." Lockup, Luther powers Mike into the ropes, measured elbow to the head. Short clothesline. Rib kick. Kneeling chinlock. Knee to the head. Kick. Release butterfly suplex. Kurkhart kicks Luther away, fights to his feet, and still gets choked. Whip, head down too son so it's kicked. Clothesline is caught and dropped with Val Venis' release half nelson suplex. Inverted reverse neckbreaker. I wonder what Bill thinks of that move. One two three. (1:44) Josh points out how short the match was, and how little time they had to talk about things during it. We've got time to kill, so here's a replay.

Courtesy of WWE.Com: 
"This is FUNAKI! DOT COM #1 Announcer! My guest is Cruiserweight Champion Spike Dudley. Hi Spike." 
"Hi." 
"I have a question for you."
"What?"
"Question for you."
"Okay."
"I'm sorry. Why won't you fight Rey Mysterio?"
"Why won't I figure Rey Mysterio? [angry] I already fought Rey Mysterio. Does everyone here have some sort of memory loss? Everybody's asking me why won't I fight Rey Mysterio. I've fought Rey Mysterio, I've beat him in the ring, I've took his title, I've put him thru a table, I broke his little body, I have nothing to prove by fighting Rey Mysterio! I'm so sick of this! What kind of question is that! You can't even speak English, why are you an answer asking me these stupid [bad Funaki accent] questions?!?"
"Okay, another question, alright? Why are you such a jerk?"
"Oh, I'm a jerk? I'm YOUR Cruiserweight champion. If you don't respect that, then maybe I should just teach you a little respect, Funaki. What do you think, huh?" [Spike piefaces him.] "What do you think, huh, huh?" [Funaki slaps him!] "You are going to regret that." [Spike leaves, Funaki stares after him.]

YJ Heidenreich kills Paul London of Thursday

Reflection of Perfection Mark Jindrak (Atlanta, GA, 263 pounds) vs Shannon Moore (Raleigh, NC, 207 pounds) - black trunks, no cape, no mirror. They've completely given up on the gimmick. Would you believe this is the fifth time they've done this match since Jindrak came over? Yes, you probably would. If Shannon wins one for once, I'll go back and do the play by play. Bill makes the case you can only say negative things about people if you're physically able to back it up, Josh disputes it, and Bill uses Bob Barker v Happy Gilmore to support his case. Shannon seems more lively than usual, not that he's not usually bouncing all over the face, but mocking the pose and slapping Jindrak shows a bit more than usual. Still not going to win. Bill thinks Big Show taking anger management is a joke. Bill says Shannon Moore is the stepping stone of WWE. "You have to survive Shannon Moore." Mark and Shannon get totally lost for a moment but figure it out a few seconds later. Bill complains about golfing being more difficult lefthanded. Josh: "I've got Lindsay Lohan calls me all the time. I've got her number on speed dial." "It was Eric Bischoff in a mask." Mark of Excellence (4:08) Maybe next time - no, he'll probably still lose. 

$1,000,000 Tough Enough

Up Next: Six Man Tag highlights - Bill says the action was Off the Chain

Clearsil Match 3 of 5 Highlight

And here's the six man. (2:25)
Up Next: Spike Dudley (c) vs Funaki for the Cruiserweight Championship

SmackDown! Live
09/07 - Tulsa, OK [SD!]
09/11 - Edmonton, AB
09/12 - Calgary, AB
09/14 - Spokane, WA [SD!]
09/18 - Jackson, MS 

WWE Cruiserweight Champion Spike Dudley (150 pounds, w/o the Dudley Boys) vs SmackDown! #1 Announcer Funaki (Japan, 208 pounds) for the Cruiserweight Title (2nd Defense) - Odd that he'd have no backup. Funaki is determined. This is the first time the belt's been defended on this show since March, and only second time this year. FUNAKI WANTS THE BELT. Circle. Lockup. Spike with a top wristlock, Funaki taken down by the hair, but Charles Robinson misses it. Back up to his feet, armdrag escape, Funaki rolls through and holds on to the wristlock. Funaki battling out, hammerlock reversal, Spike quick to the ropes. Spike demands the break loudly. He and Noble would be good partners. Spike with a shove, Funaki socks him. Funaki off the ropes, shoulderblock, off the ropes, into a fist, Spike runs into a hiptoss, armdrag, scoop, slaaaaaaaam. Spike rolls out near the desk. Bill: "Bill, questions, Josh, Trouble." Spike taking his time on the outside, and now pulling Funaki out with him. Right blocked, Funaki hits his own. Funaki throws him back in, Spike begs off, Funaki is stomping mad - Josh: "Funaki - he's Hulking Up!" Bill: "What?" "He's getting fired up." "Tommy Rich used to get fired up, remember Tommy Rich?" "I sure do." "You don't know who Tommy Rich is." Right hand, but Spike stops this with an eye rake. Josh: "When did this show become 'Billocity?'" Bill: "What are you talking about?" "I watched this show from my hospital room last week. You called it Billocity." "No, no, 'Bill DeMott on Velocity is what I said. If you say it real fast, it sounds like Billocity." Oh. Right. Whip, inverted atomic drop, clothesline, one two no. Funaki pulled back up, turnbuckle smash. Corner punches? Spike has to glare at the crowd first. One punch, then back to the mat for punches and the running stomp in the corner. Josh: "Spike stomping a mudhole in Funaki. What do you think is it a mudhole? I say it, I don't know what it is." Spike puts on a full nelson! Bill: "You have got issues! You really got hurt!" Spike to Funaki: "Give it up, you piece of [unintelligible]." Josh: "Did Spike Dudley just call Funaki a piece of sushi?" Funaki rallying - Hulking - out, Stomp on Spike's foot to get free, right, right, Spike stops him with a knee. Bill: "And that's another thing, you're always rooting for one superstar." Whip, head down too soon, Funaki kick catch enziguri. "C'MON FUNAKI! YOU CAN DO IT! I have no idea what you're talking about." Both down and slow up. Josh: "I am unbiased. I just want Funaki to win." "Isn't that the same thing?" "No." "I miss Cole." Both up at 8, Funaki wins the punch battle. Whip, dropkick, one two NO. Funaki can't believe it, off the ropes, bulldog. One two NO. Funaki checks the count. Whip, Spike back with the battering ram. Dudley Dog blocked and reversed into a backslide, one two NO! Turnbuckle smash, to the opposite corner, blocked by Spike, blocked by Funaki. Funaki elbows out, kick to the midsection. Going to the top rope, slap, Rising Sun - is shoved off. Spike was trying to use the middle rope to block, but I don't know he ever got a hold of it. Spike immediately grabs Funaki, to the ropes, Dudley Dog (using the ropes instead of the buckles - Stratusfaction-like) one two three. (6:07) Spike checks his nose quite a bit. A few parting words for Funaki on the way out.

That's it.