tv pg lv cc entertainment, Batista's road to WM 21, pre decision (1:03) open 

Maven (Charlottesville, VA, 225 pounds) vs Val Venis (Las Vegas, 244 pounds) - so is Justin Roberts the official ring announcer for this show now? Wow, like the match I least want when I'm really tired and not too enthusiastic. Actually, I don't know what match they could have I could want. Coach is still hating on Val. Circle., no, Maven's gonna hide in the ropes. Break. Todd is hot for those guy's bodies. Maven with a kick, armbar, forearm to the shoulder, forearm to shoulder, shoulder to the shoulder, headlock, punch to the head. Whip, reversed into the Val knee. Maven's seen this movie, and tries to slide out of the ring to prevent the rest, but Val's still gotta a hold of him and stomps him. Maven brought back up, running knee, and down goes Maven. Val calls for another, Maven tries to slide free again, Val stops him, pulls him up, and drops him down with the Russian legsweep. Later: Coach has an in-ring interview with La Resistance. That'll go well. Val with a hip swivel for Maven, and punches to the had. off the ropes, knee drop. One two no. Val chops Maven, shoulder to the midsections. Corner whip, no, Maven blocks it and gets in an eye rake. Running knee to the back. Elbow drop to the back, elbow drop to the back, elbow drop to the back, stomp to the back because Maven's not falling down again. Val brought up to get forearmed down. Another. Maven hip swivel! Coach says Maven has a new finish involving the lower back, but he has to wear it down first. More forearms to the back. Middle rope choke. Back suplex. One two no. Whip, Maven running with knee lift (!), and the abdominal stretch. Val blocks it, so Maven loses him up with shots to the side, and then stretches him. Val picks the leg, but Maven grabs the ropes to balance, and Chad Patten doesn't notice. Oh, finally he did. Maven leaves it on for a four count, and shoves Val down. Maven argues the count was to fast, and Val punches him. Chop. Right. Clothesline. Back elbow. Chop. Whip, kneelift. One two no. Maven sneaks in a kick, but his clothesline is ducked and turned into the half nelson slam. Val looks around, and starts to head up, but he stops when he notices Maven rolls away. Stomps by Val. Suplex, no Maven slips behind, and there's The Move. Inverted double knee backbreaker? I dunno. One two three. (5:07) Coach is happy to see The Move. Don't raise his hurting arm.

Todd: "Well, the Rock's new movie, Be Cool, opens Friday." The Rock in Be Cool montage. I guess this settles things, a bit. (:40)

WM 21: 35 Days

Already in the ring are La Resistance and the Coach:
Coach: "Ladies and Gentlemen, my guests at this time, the former Tag Team Champions of the World, La Resistance. [boooooooooo] Now, guys, I know you're out here for a reason, there's got to be something you've got to get off your chest, so the Coach is going to give you a little bit of time on his show to say when you've got to say. Sylvan, go right ahead."
Grenier: "Thank you Coach, we really appreciate. [USA USA USA USA] La Resistance is out here to protest about our loss of the World Tag Team Titles in Japan! They didn't beat us fair and square, Coach, you know that! They had to cheat!"
Conway: "It was unfair that we had to face Tajiri and Regal in Tajiri's home country of Japan! And then Tajiri blatantly cheated when he spit green mist in Sylvan's eye! I saw it, all of you saw it, and the referee - he should've seen it!"
Grenier "Coach, you know, Regal and Tajiri are not the real tag team champions. Everybody know. Who, everybody? Who support La Resistance? Stand up! [booo]"
Coach: "Hey hey hey, don't pay attention to any of them! They don't know what they're talking about. The most impotent thing is you two have the Coach's support. And most importantly, you have Eric Bischoff's support. And as far as I'm concerned, we all know that William Regal and Tajiri are a joke! And I think it's obvious to everybody, all over the world, that what they've been doing the last couple of weeks is -"

[TAJIRI's music plays. ENTER Tajiri and William Regal. Guys in the ring are confident.]

Coach: "Wait a second wait a second wait a second. [to La Resistance] Hey boys, let the Coach handle this one. [to champs, just entering the ring] Look what we have, Sir William Regal, and that little punk, Tajiri. What's a matter boys, did you come out here looking for a fight? Something you had to say? Well, I don't like that you interrupted the Coach, when I'm out here with the Real Tag Team Champions. Wha wha what's that? You still don't have anything to say. Well, let the Coach say, in addition to all this greatness, you're looking at a man who finished fifth longest in in the Royal Rumble! And where were you two? I almost forget, you were in the back, watching the Coach compete! So I'm feeling pretty confident. What do you say boys, should we take on these two clowns, here, tonight? [TAJIRI and REGAL make a move towards COACH] WHOA whoa whoa whoa whoa, I'm going to take that little step as a yes. And it's gonna be, now that I think about it, the three of us, tonight, but it's not going to be right now, because as you can see, the Coach isn't dressed to compete. It's going to take me a few minutes to change, it's going to take you a few minutes to find any partner that you want. It may take you a while, because as we know, you don't have a whole lot of friends in the back. What's the matter Tajiri, you still don't understand what I have to say? You've been here for like seventeen years, you still don't understand English! Well understand this, tonight's going to be great for the three of us, not so good for you two. But right now, I'm tired of looking at your faces, so if you don't mind, turn those butts around, head back up the ramp, and find yourself a partner, get ready for a breakdown. What do you have to say today." 

[REGAL meekly begs off, he and TAJIRI turn to leave - but TAJIRI spins around and spits green mist in both La Resistance faces! Coach feels the ring and stars to go in the crowd and we go to break.]

Moments Ago: MIST. Coach isn't really pleased with this replay. Look at the bruise? discoloration? on Regal's head.      

RAW: Edge/Christian reunite again for the first time. I guess Orton couldn't hear what was going on after he passed thru the curtain? (3:47)

RAW: Shawn Michaels vs Edge in a Street Fight
Tonight: Coach and La Resistance vs World Tag Team Champions William Regal and Tajiri, and ???

Slam of the Week, presented by Juicy Drop Pop: Chris Masters debut. Why are they using the MXC music for this? So weird.

the Hurricane & Rosey (590 pounds) vs Mike Yamaha & Shane Spears? (395 pounds, already in the ring) - Local guy's introduction is talked over by Coach, who thinks Masters is too cocky, even for him. I'm sorry, I'm really tired, so let me just tell you if this adds anything to the oeuvre of Rosey and Hurricane matches. Did I even use that word right? They're so going to talk about Coach's match anyway. Grisham notes these two seem to fight jobbers every week, which feels right even if it's not. Coach thinks it does not matter who Tajiri and Regal pick; Grisham proposes Kane, but Coach is not scared. If this was RAW, it'd be Kane, but this isn't RAW. They're also making many Yamaha jokes, or the same joke many times. Shane Spears slaps his own bicep, I guess it deserved it. Finish is the side slam/Eye of the Hurricane combo. (Hurricane pins Spears, 5:05)

Up Next: Contract Signing.

RAW Live
Monday - Providence, RI
Friday - Corpus Christi, TX
Saturday - Greensboro, NC
Sunday - Norfolk, VA
Next Monday - Raleigh, NC

WM: Basic Instinct

And here we go. It's pretty funny that Grisham made fun of Triple H's Giving Away Of The Plan on Experience. Probably showcasing who actually watches these shows, too. (2:16)

WM21: Triple H (c) vs Batista for the World Championship
Tonight: Coach and La Resistance vs World Tag Team Champions William Regal and Tajiri, and ???

Coach & La Resistance (722 pounds) vs World Tag Team Champions William Regal & Tajiri (580 pounds) and ??? - Sadly, no Coach music. Todd Grisham: "And now it's time for the maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain event. And usually the Coach is sitting next to me, giving me a stupid look when I make that sound, but there he is." Looks like Grisham is getting to fly solo here. Coach's got the "I am the Coach, that's why!!!" shirt going. It even says "Any other stupid questions???" on the back. And "Coach" on his butt. Earlier Today, mist was spit. Regal and Tajiri give each other dueling "wait, I thought you were getting the third guy - well, where is he, then?" WHO'S THE THIRD MAN? WHO'S IS IT, TONY? Naturally:

Coach & La Resistance vs William Regal & Tajiri & Rhyno (Detroit, MI, 275 pounds) - Looks like Rhyno is working on one knee, but that's one more knee than Coach feels comfortable with at the moment. Hahaha, La Resistance hasn't gotten the mist off their face yet. Conway is a green machine. ECW ECW ECW. Who's going to start? Conway and Tajiri. Tajiri wastes no time hitting hard kicks to the side and the punch, but Conway is able stop it with forearms. Whip, clothesline.  Stomps. Coach is talkative, imagine that. "Teach that kid a lesson!" Corner forearms. Grisham brings up Coach beating Tajiri, like the Coach is still announcing in spirit, but Grisham also brings up Tajiri having misted Coach in the past. Conway whip, handspring elbow back at him. Wheel kick, standing moonsault, one two NO broken up. Snap mare, tag to Regal, stereo kicks to the front and back. European Uppercut, snap mare, knee drop, one tow no. Tag to Rhyno, forearm. Right. Armbar, but Conway frees himself with a hard forearm. Tag to Grenier, who get sun over by Rhyno. Right. Rhyno with a right hand, but Grenier kicks him back, and gets some rights and kicks in the corner. Corner whip, charge into an elbow. Rhyno with kicks. Whip, reversed, into a Grenier flapjack causes Grenier to kip up and dance. Elbow drop added a little but late, one two NO. Coach complains about the count. Greiner gets in some knees. Corner whip, reversed, and Rhyno charges in with a shoulder. Rhyno's limping on his bad leg now, and he tags out after few more strikes. Gotta wonder how hurt he is; no one's going to go out with an injury this close to WM. Regal works over Grenier with knees and shot to the midsection while Tajiri gets the crowd yelling. Coach distracts Choida, and Conway gets in a knee to Regal from the apron. Grenier sneaks in a forearm to the midsection, and Conway snaps Regal's neck over the top rope. Choke on the mat, chock to the middle rope, Grenier choke on the middle rope. Grenier covers, one two no. Regal taking back to the evil corner, but scaring Coach to the floor. Choke on the middle rope, which Coach blatantly getting involved. Now La Resistance distracts so Coach can try getting in that choke again - but Regal's trying to choke him back! Tag to Conway, and he gets in elbows and stomps. Right. Reverse neckbreaker chinlock. Crowd: "SHUT UP COACH SHUT UP COACH" ha. Coach: "Will you guys shut up?" Regal turns it and gets in some right hands, Conway gets in a kick to back Regal into the evil corner, but Regal cleans house (Coach bailing out before he gets hurt.) Regal rests for a second, and Conway sandwiches him with a clothesline. Conway beats Regal down - and Coach tags himself in! Conway doesn't seem too pleased about that one. Ghetto stomp. Forearm. Taunting Tajiri. Elbow drop but no one's home! Tag to Rhyno! Right for Coach! Right for Conway, right for Grenier, right for Conway, right for Grenier, breath. Whip, reversed, Rhyno clotheslines Conway. Grenier get sin a kick, whip, quick reverses into a side belly to belly suplex, one two Conway breaks it out. Looks like Coach rolled out during the mayhem, but Tajiri is in for the other side to help out. Kick to Conway's shoulder, kick to the midsection, whip, reversed and Tajiri sent into the corner, Conway charges in right to the Tarantula, but Grenier breaks it up in no time. They've forgotten Rhyno, and he's waiting for someone to turn around, GO-no, Coach tripped him! La Resistance Hart Attack on Rhyno! La Resistance heads out to take care of the champs as Coach crawls in one two NO! NO! Coach can't believe it! Regal gets up on the apron to complain to Choida, as Tajiri's slipped back in - execution kick! Rhyno covers, one two three. (6:42) Champs and Rhyno are happy. Coach ain't moving. Is Regal bleeding from his nose?  

"For an unconscious Jonathon Coachman, I'm Todd Grisham!" That's it.