how long is Spike going to be playing this "campaign speeches" bumper? Midterm elections?

TV PG LV entertainment open no fireworks

Batista (Washington, DC, 310 pounds) vs Val Venis (Las Vegas, NV, 242 pounds) - We look at Batista in ring a long time, which make me think they're not doing the desk shot. Your ring announcer is Fink. Your ref is Mike Choida. With Maven not here this week, Val takes over pointing at Coach. WHEN WANNABE NEW HOMETOWNS OF THE EXPOS COLLIDE. Val is so scared of Batista, he has to take off his towel on the apron. And he lost all of his hair! Except his goatee. So whatever. Todd says Val is not that much smaller than Batista, which will get him fined. Circle. Lockup. Batista backs Val into the corner. Break ordered, and Val uses the opening to punch, punch, punch and get thrown into the corner. Batista charges, but Val gets up his boot. Val working Baits over with hamstring kicks. Off the ropes, big spinebuster. Batista has time to pose and glower, because Val's still doing his "oh my aching back" bit ten seconds later. One two no. Headbutt to Batista's back? They shot that very oddly. Elbow to Val's back. Suplex. One two no. Val set up on the apron and then pulled out by Batista for forearms and the like. Barricade smash, apron smash, back on the mat for an elbow smash. Flat of the foot to the head. And again. Coach would join Evolution if asked. Knee to the head. Back in, Val trying to fight his way up but runs into a back elbow. Scoop and a slam. Val trying to battle up again, corner whip, reversed, Batista into a back elbow, Val with right hands and chops while the crowd makes an odd and seemingly unrelated bit of noise. Whip, Batista puts his head down too, Val with the kick, off the ropes, clothesline but that just knocks Batista into the ropes, Batista rebounds with his big clothesline. Batista stalks around the ring. Batistabomb. One two three. (4:18)

your announcers are Coach and Todd, who talk about Coach's match on RAW and Maven as GM.

The Monster Job of The Week is either Lita losing by DQ to Trish, or Trish's nose to chair and the ring post.

Viscera (487 pounds) vs Steven Lee (someplace in Indiana, 245 pounds) - they have an entrance video and music for Viscera. Your referee is Chris Kay. Viscera equals "two Jonathon Coachman and one Todd Grisham combined." How about no. Highlight of the match is Todd calling an elbow drop "a legdrop". Coach does subtly correct. This matches goes far too long just so he can work in the alleged spinning wheel kick. Double choke bomb is called the Embaler - somewhere, A-Train is crying. (3:05) Post match choke to appall Todd Grisham.

Coming Up: Christian shows us how he rolls

ECW Moment: RVD beats Bam Bam Bigelow for the TV Title, 04/04/98. Wow, they did all of two moments.

the Edge and Christian reunion you weren't hoping for. Way to make something neat end up kinda sad! That may be this year's theme. (3:50)
Up Next: the Hurricane vs Tyson Tomko

WWE Rewind presented by M&Amazing: Lingerie Pillow Fight.

Tyson Tomko (Jacksonville, FL, 285 pounds) vs the Hurricane (215 pounds) - Tyson is keeping Christian's old music. Todd thinks it's a treat to see Tomko without Christian, and then drops the "CLB" name even Christian's given up on. I can't believe it says "I Love This Guy" in the Yu Yu Hakushu ad copy. Lockup. Hurricane shoved off and taunted. Circle. Lockup, Hurricane headlock, shot off, back, and a shoulderblock spins Hurricane out, knocked him into the ropes. Forearm by Tyson, whip, Tyson misses a clothesline, Hurricane holds onto the ropes to stop and pose. Tyson charges into a European Uppercut, and Hurricane runs Tyson into the opposite corner. Todd notes Hurricane's had "big wins", but doubts he can win here. Corner punches stopped at four and he's lifted off with a double choke. Tyson walks him into the middle of the ring and throws him into the corner of the ring. Press, into a fallaway slam. Hurricane rolls out. Tyson walks around before following. Hurricane run back first into the apron. Thrown in. Tyson chokes, trash talks. Corner whip, rebound backdrop. Neck vice by Tomko. Todd says "WCW". Todd and Coach discuss how ugly Tyson Tomko is - Coach is on the "very" side. Your ref is Jack Doan. Hurricane elbows out. Tyson with a forearm to stop him, whip, clothesline misses, crossbody connects one two no. Big clothesline stops this. Choke. Back to the neck vice. RAW Interactive plug. They're totally like WCW now! Hurricane fighting back with punches, and then more punches. I've really done a great job of making this perfectly average match sound really unexciting, huh? I have no idea why. Corner whip, Tyson runs into a double boot, and then takes a seated Tornado DDT one two no. Hurricane going up for what? Top rope clothesline one two NO. He's got three different moves for that set up, and it's not an easy set up. Hurricane off the ropes, into the boot. One two NO. Slam, no, Hurricane slips behind. Thumb to the eye, whip, reversed into a Torture Rack into a neckbreaker. One two three. (4:26) That was kinda unnecessary. Viscera's finisher has a name but Tyson Tomko's finisher does not.

Tonight: Chris Jericho vs Steven Richards

RAW Live
Monday - Buffalo, NY [RAW]
Friday - Hershey, PA
Saturday - Philadelphia, PA
Sunday - Bethlehem, PA
Next Monday - Baltimore, MD

Coach and Todd talk about the wild, wild, Maven RAW. 
Which way would he go? (2:42)
RAW: Who will be the GM?

WrestleMania Recall, sponsored by Clearsil for Men: HBK rides in form the rafters, 1996.

Mohammed Hassan vignette 3. Captioning thinks it's Aqbar. Did you notice the Arafat headline behind Davari's right shoulder. It was a nice touch. (2:14)

Chris Jericho (Manhasset, NY, 227 pounds) vs Heat GM Steven Richards (Philadelphia, PA, 230 pounds) - Todd theorizes Jericho might know he's GM Monday, and so he's tuning up here. Steven's really let his hair grow out. Coach claims Steven requested (booked! it's his show!) this match as rematch for their 09/05 Heat encounter - I'd like a rematch of Steven schooling Jericho on the microphone, but it doesn't look like we're getting it. Todd terms it a Heat MOTYC! Sadly not in those words. Crowd chants for one of these two men. Your ref is Mike Choida, which means it probably wasn't Mike Choida before and I'm losing my mind. Lockup, no move, break. Circle. Lockup, Jericho headlock takeover, Steven with a headscissors reversal, Jericho looking for a way out, and escaping. Jericho "shoe shine!" if you're Todd, soft shoe to the rest of us. Steven spasmodically mocks Jericho's dance steps. Shove. Jericho chops him! Kick. Forearm, chop, chop, corner whip, charge in, clothesline. Whip, back elbow by Jericho, and Steven needs to think this over. Jericho is saying high to part of the    crowd Steven on the apron, but shying away form Jericho. Jericho has to be backed up so Steven will come in. Test of Strength? Jericho does the hand switch gag, and kicks Steen when he gets bored of it. Whip, reverse, head down too soon, Jericho chops Steven. Whip, Steven sunset flip, Jericho fights it, then rolls thru into the Wall of Jericho - but Steven gets a hold of the ropes. Coach kisses up to Jericho in case he's GM. Steven escapes to the apron, but get an eye poke. Springboard, but no one's home for the dropkick and Jericho falls to the floor alone. Steven brings Jericho back in and starts stomping to a Y2J. Stomps. Jumping reverse neckbreaker! Steven is very proud. Elbow to the back. One two no. Chop. Back suplex. One two no. Chin lock with bodyscissrors - not quite the Kathastevie. Steven lets go of the bodyscissors and Jericho rallies up. Elbows out, but Steven pulls him down by the hair. Coach on Jericho's nicknames: "'Highlight of the Night', 'RAW is Jericho', 'I'm a sexy beast'. He's got so many. And they're all stupid!" YAAAAsuplex into a reverse neckbreaker? How odd. One two NO. Choke on the middle rope. Steven mocking Jericho's warmup steps! Dude Love dance! Off the ropes, second rope sit is stopped by a Jericho clothesline! Both guys rallying by (opposite) ropes. Jericho right, chop, whip, reversed, back with a fivearm. Jericho off the ropes, clothesline. Off the ropes, clothesline is ducked by Steven, and Steven thinks he's smart. Jericho: "C'MON, ASSCLOWN!" Steven charges - right into a drop toe hold on the middle rope. Now Jericho does his own warm up steps, off the ropes, second rope knee to the back connects. Bulldog. "C'mon Baby!" Lionsault - no, KNEES! Steven to Jericho and the crowd out on that one. Steven with a BK Bomb! One two NO! Calling for the StevieKick! Coach has this weird idea that Steven's going to buy him drinks if he wins. I think it works the other way, and not with his least favorite employee! StevieKick - CAUGHT! WALLS! a sad sad thing indeed. (7:03) "No drinks, no dinner, no celebration."

Who's GM? WATCH RAW.

Thatsit.