Oblivious: the Game Show you don't know is still on (till it's on before Heat.) That host is a regular John Cena there

TV PG DV CC entertainment open no fireworks

Rico (Las Vegas, NV, 228 pounds, w/Jackie Gayda and her ugly heart outfit) vs this is a Test (282 pounds) - I mean, c'mon. Hefty wants her to be their new spokeswoman, because that outfit screams trashy. Wardrobe can't win them all, obviously. Rico's pants are splendid, on the other hand. Coach wants to take credit for Miss Jackie's outfit, which is an idea I guess. Wait, did Rico turn face? Because all he faces are heels any more. Back to Last Monday, where Coach is fine with Steven and Victoria being pushed down, but don't he dare powerbomb Trish. Coach still can't figure out why Christian is helping out Trish. Maybe he doesn't watch RAW. Rico jumping up into Test's arm to give him a kiss, check. Test don't take to no gays. Rico swat on the butt, check. Test killing him with a clothesline, check. Test yells at Rico for touching him in improper ways while he stomps. Armsmash into the apron. "I'm not that way!" Stomps. Right. Kick. Kick. Right. I think Coach just accidentally insinuated that Victoria is a lesbian ("can't get Victoria to cross the fence") - Al catches it too. Corner whip, clothesline, throwing Rico down by the hair. Oh wait, Al just thinks Steven > Test, so why would Victoria make a switch? Jackie pounding the mat to the crowd into it, wow Rico IS a face. Someone should've put out a memo. Test takes a moment from mocking Rico stomp on Jackie's hand. Test goes back to punching Rico in the head region. Dragging him over the ropes, knees to the back, off the ropes, running whatever is sidestepped and Test just kinda runs into the ropes and falls down. Rico with a jawbreaker. Gut punches. Face punches. Test stops this with a knee to the midsection. Whip, clothesline misses, Rico's doesn't. Dropkick. Rico's arm is hurting, but it doesn't stop him from riding Test like a horse (check.) Al: "You've done that before." "Yea, but not with Rico." Test gets free, misses a clothesline, and takes a pinning kick to the gut. Step over heel kick one two no. Clothesline is caught into the full nelson release suplex slam one two no. Al wants me to say that's a powerbomb but eh. Test starts warming up the boot, but then decides to be distracted by Jackie on the apron. Facing away from the camera. Test moves towards her, but moves out of the way of Rico's charge, Rico holds up just in front of Jackie, Jackie drops to the floor to advert disaster, Test tries the boot, Rico moves out of the way. Rico tries a inside cradle, Test has the middle ropes to block, Jackie "flashes" Test (totally cut out of view - wouldn't even realize what had happened if the announcers didn't react and she hadn't been doing in spots lately), Test is flummoxed and lets go of the ropes, Rico finishes the inside cradle one two three (3:03) The best thing that ever happened to Rico is Jackie not being in Playboy. 

Your announcers are Al and Coach, who probably would've done the same thing if they were Test, Coach assures us.

Tonight: Dudley Boyz vs Matt Hardy (Version One), Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrak

Up Next: Randy is going to that ring and he's calling Mick Foley out.

WMXX in 21 days

Tag Team Title match video package - well, actually it's just the backdrop for Foley/Orton. (3:23)

Renè Duprèe (262 pounds w/Rob Conway) vs Val Venis (Las Vegas, NV, 242 pounds, w/Lance Storm) - La Resistance has new tights? Seems like an unwise investment. Announcers don't think we'll see Mick Foley any time soon. Hey, it's the battle of tag teams RAW forgot. Rene kicks at Lance outside the ring for fun. Atlas pose. Lockup, Rene forced into the ropes, turning it around the ropes, into the middle of the ring and back where they started. USA chant. You know why they're chanting USA here? Because Val Venis is from Las Vegas. Val ends the dance with an armdrag. Armbar. Coach: "You know, I think these people fail to remember that Val Venis and Lance Storm are from Canada." Al: "You're right. You are." I GIVE UP. (Rene DVD, 3:36) Rene won sorta clean, though Val was slow on the Money Shot because he opted to watch Lance beat down Conway for trying to interfere. Rene did do the Dance.

Tonight: Dudley Boyz vs Matt Hardy (Version One), Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrak
Next: "The Undertaker is DEAD! DEAD! DEAD! DEAD! DEAAAAAAAAD!"

Last Monday: Kane wanders in to the Jericho/Trish/Kane storyline. DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD. (7:24)

Snickers Cruncher Eric Bischoff challenges Vince McMahon of WCW Thunder, 05/14/98. Courtesy of Monday Night Wars: the DVD. No date actually given but hey this was more fun looking up than Coach and Al tonight. You know what the greatest thing is? The next bit on the show was...Mando Guerrero being interviewed about how he was disappointed in Eddie's treatment of Chavo. 

Coach: "Eric Bischoff, my boss, challenging Vince McMahon more than two years ago..." good lord

Vince vs Eric, the set up. (2:45)
RAW: Vince McMahon's Major Wrestlemania XX Announcement

the Hurricane (215 pounds) vs Jon Heidenreich (New Orleans, LO, 275 pounds) - No Rosey? Not that I'm complaining. Hurricane actually knows who little Johnny is, right? I remember that. Very very very sad. To protect that top secret info, Jon rushes Hurricane with punches and forearms. Back suplex, with a lot of emphasis on landing on the back rather than the head. Coach talked to Jon today (meeting of the minds) and Jon said he's got a new lease on life, and feels new success is on his way. Al thinks Jon over Hurricane is a major * 3 upset. Hurricane trying to chop Jon down with punches, and Jon stops that with a knee tot he gut. Corner whip, Jon charges into what we're calling a European Uppercut this week. Hurricane with aright hands, Jon pushes him into the ropes, Hurricane grabs the ropes, Jon charges, Hurricane pulls the ropes down, and Jon flies out. Hurricane going to fly? Tope con giro! Everything somersaulty is a hilo to WWE announcers. Hurricane with forearms, throwing Jon in and running him into the corner. Corner punches one two three Jon lifts him off the corner for an inverted atomic drop, except he drops Hurricane far too much forward for it to work. Hurricane improvises an eye poke. Whip? No, but Jon can hit one of his own. Jon charges in, Hurricane moves, Jon hits the corner. Top rope cross body time? Hurricane thinks so, but Jon grabs him - big press off the top rope, and dropping him by the neck on the top rope. Swinging side slam one two three. (1:43) I guess it's time for take 2? What's with the match times on this show?

Tonight: Dudley Boyz vs Matt Hardy (Version One), Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrak
Maybe they're giving extra time there.

RAW Live
Monday - Omaha, NE [RAW]
Friday - Montgomery, AL
Saturday - Birmingham, AL
Sunday - Chattanooga, TN
Next Monday - Atlanta, GA [RAW]

Hey, they're running Gwinnett - same place as a lucha show next month. Not that I think Santo is going to draw more...though that would be nifty. 

WM Recall: Gimmick Battle Royale, 2001.

Goldberg at No Way Out (1:50)

Matt Hardy (Version One, Cameron, NC, 228 pounds) and Garrison Cade & Mark Jindrak (no weight?) vs all three Dudley Boyz (653 pounds) - Matt has exceptionally long eyelashes. Matt's hose has *4* bathrooms. Matt is thankful to still get his own entrance here. Fink's slipping if those two have no weight. Funny how Spike doesn't have a hometown till he's with these guys. Bubba and D-Von take a moment to yell at Coach before going to the ring. Garrison and Mark want to mix up right now with the Dudleyz (Matt having left the ring to figure out what the heck happened to his career), but time for our last break first.

Matt Hardy, Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrak vs all three Dudley Boyz - Match may have started during the break, and we come in with D-Von ramming D-Von into the corner. Looks like D-Von is still wearing rib tape, and Matt takes advantage with punches to the midsection. VEEEONEAAAAAAH ow as he gets punched repeatedly from D-Von. Matt rolls out to safety as D-Von is kept in the ring. Matt given room to come back in, so he dos, and he tags in Jindrak to take care of this for him. Jindrak with a kick to the midsection, right, kick, right, whip, clothesline misses, D-Von's does not. Slam. One two no. Tag to Bubba, who puts an armbar on Jindrak and cranks it. Headlock, takeover. Back up to his feet. Tag to Spike, top rope axhandle to the arm. Forearms, but Jindrak stops him with a knee. Spike thrown into the corner, Jindrak charges into a boot, Spike charges out and hits the spinning headscissors. Spike with the in place running stomping on Jindrak. Tag to D-Von, right hand. Right. Jindrak gets in a punch and tags in Cade. Kick, right, forearm. Coach: "The purple lights, the rain-" Al: "It's either the Undertaker coming back, or it's Prince!" Coach is pretty sure it's not Prince. Whip, Garrison misses a clothesline, D-Von does not miss his spinning back elbow. Ugly forearm for Jindrak, clothesline for Matt, Cade finally stops this with a clothesline of his own. Cade socks Bubba while he's at it.  Spike tries to get a shot in on Cade but is held back by the ref. Forearm to D-Von's back. Headlock. Crowd calling for D-Von, D-Von shoots him off into the Dudleyz corner. Bubbas gets a revenge shot and some forearms. Referee Chad Patten is supposed to be distracted by that, though he momentarily turns the other way and then has to forget he saw Matt Hardy slipping in and dropping D-von with a back suplex. VEEEONE. He's thrilled to be Matt right now. Jindrak in and stomping. Snap mare, tag to Matt, Matt with stomping. Turnbuckle smash. Right. Al's mentioned Matt's losing streak five times in the last thirty seconds. Corner whip, Matt charges into a back elbow, D-Von charges out into the Side Effect. One two one. Standing surfboard, with a foot in the back. D-Von getting up and turning it around, back elbow, right to the head, off the ropes, Matt with a back elbow. Tag to Cade, Cade covers one two no. Tag to Jindrak, hold for a kick. Jindrak with stomp. Dropkick by Jindrak. Coach says Jindrak has the best dropkick in the business. He also said that Jindrak has the best punch in the business, but people don't care about Palumbo getting annoyed. Jindrak with right hands, corner whip, corner cross body (how would that actually work?) but no one's home. Tag to Cade, tag to Bubba. Shoulderblock by Bubba, clothesline by Bubba. Whip, backdrop. Shoulderblock for Jindrak. Matt - is staying on the apron, good move. Whip for Cade, Cade tries to reverse it, Bubbas cuts it short with a kick, reverse neckbreaker one two NO. Samoan Drop one two no Jindrak breaks it up and Coach is confused about who is who. Mark with a corner whip, lame charge into a lame boot, Spike makes a blind tag and climbs up the corner to hit a spot that's not coming yet, Bubba wanders around and throws Mark out of the ring. Since he's in the neighborhood, Bubba punches Matt, who is still not moving from the corner. Cade spins Bubba round, right hand misses, Bubba shoves Cade into a Spike top rope cross body one two Matt tries to break it up with an elbow drop but Spike moves and Cade takes it. Matt is confused, and takes a battering ram headbutt from Spike. Stumbling into Bubba's jab jab jab crotch grab, Matt tries his own punch and misses, Bubba with a slam. Spike is boot choking Cade in one corner, distracted the ref from D-Von going up, and hitting the headbutt to the groin. Bubba and D-Von tell the crowd they're going to end it. Matt is slow up, turns, realizes what's up and flees the ring. Meanwhile, Spike tries the Dudley Dog on Cade, but Jindrak helps block and push him off (at least that's what was supposed to happen) and Spike flapjacks himself. Bubba and D-Von are oblivious (it's all a circle) and wander out of the ring after Matt, leaving Spike to be covered by Cade one two three. (6:49) Matt is THRILLED to get the win, treating it like a Gold Medal victory. I wonder if he'll still have a losing streak on RAW.

RAW: Vince McMahon's Major Wrestlemania XX Announcement

That's it.