TNA Wrestling Impact! #8 - 07/23/04
by Scott Christ
Eight whole weeks of Impact!. How will we celebrate? With a visit by the NWA world champion? Obviously. Big XII Showcase before Impact! teaches me that Ken Harvey went to high school with the Menendez brothers and Monica Lewinsky.
Stage 21 in Orlando, airing July 23, 2004, taped a day before
This Wednesday, another Ultimate X with Styles v. Shane v. Kazarian. Right now, fireworks!! Kraaaazy Kaplan's!
NON-TITLE MATCH - JERRELLE CLARK v. AJ STYLES (X Champion): Your referee is the blonde one. C&E, Styles with a side headlock, top wristlock and a takedown. Clark backflips, hammerlock, let's look at Jeff Hammond. Styles with a headlock, off the ropes, shoulderblock puts Clark down. Trade of leapfrogs, Styles hits the standing dropkick. Judge is Dusty Rhodes. Clark goes over the top of Styles, nice takedown into an armbar. Styles Quinton Jacksons his way out. Kick to the bad arm from Clark. What would happen if you added a 619 to a tarantula? What Clark did. Moonsault -> inverted DDT, but it hurts the bad shoulder again. Clark with a kick to the knee, off the ropes, tilt-a-whirl, Russian legsweep is blocked, double underhook -> STYLES CLASH. 1, 2, 3. (2'55") Pretty good and competitive for a three-minute match as Styles allows Clark to make an impression in the squash.
NEXT - Team Mexico's Abismo Negro & Mr. Aguila v. Abyss & Alex Shelley
Commercials
What the hell was that video package
ALEX SHELLEY & ABYSS (with Goldylocks) v. ABISMO NEGRO & MR. AGUILA: Well this should be...interesting. Your referee is Rudy Charles. Shelley starts with Negro. Chain wrestling to start with Shelley getting a toe-hold. Negro reverses into a roll-up for two, let's trade pins. Goldylocks is so corny. And kind of awesome. Team Mexico double-teams on Shelley and dominate him. Aguila with a chop, off the ropes, clothesline. Tag back to Negro, but he gets hit with some move I missed. Abyss tags in and he is STRONG. Tag back to Shelley after Abyss shows how strong he is. Shelley with a snap suplex, floatover, two count. Aguila tags in and he's on fire. Abyss comes in to get chopped down, but nevermind, how about chokeslams for both of you. No! Double "bulldog" from Team Mexico for two. Abyss is legal? Oh, no, he's not. Shelley with a headscissors on Aguila, inverted atomic drop on Negro. Up top, but he's dropkicked to the floor. Abyss is back in with a clothesline on Negro. Aguila's back. This is a mess. Handspring something into a torture rack backbreaker from Abyss. Negro brings the chops but Abyss is very strong. Black hole slam on Negro, Shelley dropkicks Aguila in the back of the head. Both cover, Shelley's counts (SINCE HE'S FUCKING LEGAL) - 1, 2, 3. I missed the time, it was a little over five minutes I think. This was okay but Team Mexico still has trouble with new opponents.
Commercials
Last week, Jeff Hardy showed up and signed a contract.
ANTONIO BANKS v. MONTY BROWN: Who the hell is Antonio Banks. Your referee is the blonde one. Take a guess at this match. Pounce, 123. (1'45")
Commercials
Oh man, stills from the PPV. This IS big-time.
TEAM CANADA (Petey Williams, Bobby Roode, Eric Young & Johnny Devine, with Scott D'Amore) v. CHRIS SABIN, AMAZING RED, SONJAY DUTT & MIKEY BATTS: This should be suitably impossible to follow. Sonjay and Red start off with double-team moves on lots of people. Nice to see Mikey Batts in a real match, I guess. Devine and Dutt start and Devine hits a moonsault? Kind of? Is that on purpose? Roode tags in and stomps away. Blatant choke while Charles is busy with Sabin. Dutt manages to fight back and tag Sabin in. Sabin and Petey further preview my IWA main event next Saturday. Sabin cleans house on everyone. Oh Jesus - all of Team Canada on four corners, quadruple hurricanranas. Let's all dive!! Ahhhhhhh!!!! SHit! AThis ics crazy! I love TNA! TGNAZ! OHHH MORE DIVING! HOLY CRAP!! Williams in with Batts, and here's an obvious fallguy. Canadian Destroyer! 1, 2, 3. (4'16")
NEXT - Impact! debut! of! Raven!
Commercials
More stills
ROMEO v. RAVEN: Brian Gleine is excited over Kid Romeo. Raven's hair looks good again, finally. Raven dominates from the get-go, as expected. To the floor and Raven with the Russian legsweep into the guardrail. And again. And a third. Off the buckles, stagger, running clothesline. Running knee. Raven Effect. 1, 2, 3. Well then. (1'51") But here comes SABU through the crowd. They have a confrontation. Raven slaps him, Sabu turns to leave, but instead he finally fights back. Trade of punches until security breaks it up.
NEXT - Dusty Rhodes joins Jeff Hammond
Commercials
Dusty is with Hammond, they'll talk. I'm not recording this so I'm not going to bother trying really. He likes Impact, he's trying to like Russo, he likes Jeff Hardy, he likes Monty Brown, he does not like Jarrett, Impact is hot. I really like Jeff Hammond's role.
Allow us to introduce two members of the U.S. Olympic wrestling team: JOE WILLIAMS (163) and DANIEL CORMIER (212).
Mike and Don have themselves a time. Okay guys shut up. You have matches left.
THE ELITE GUARD jog to the ringside area.
NEXT - Jeff Jarrett
Commercials
NON-TITLE MATCH - JEFF JARRETT (NWA Champion) v. SHARK BOY: My god. Referee is Rudy Charles. Shark Boy is dumped out immediately and sent into the railing, so I guess Jarrett liked that Raven match. Into the crowd and Shark Boy is rammed into more stuff. Chair to the gut. Shot to the back. No DQ or anything huh? This is retarded. More standing around in the crowd. Shark Boy comes back and bites Jarrett's ass. Camera man goes down. Back into the ring finally, Shark Boy's up top and hits a missile dropkick. Another, another, cover, 2. Reverse neckbreaker doesn't work, Stroke does. 1, 2, 3. (4'14")
Jarrett calls Hardy out, circling Shark Boy with his guitar. Yeah, Shark Boy eats guitar. Here comes JEFF HARDY! Dropkicks and junk, but here comes Monty Brown THE POUNCE!!! Jarrett and Brown go eye-to-eye.
PPV hype, and we're out.