(originally posted by Joe on 12/16/02)

12/15/2002 Workrate Reports

Lots going on here

What Worked

Hey, Super Crazy’s coming. In between tours with New Japan, anyway.

Mr. Power and Ricky Marvin had one of those Guapo tryouts. Ricky runs up the ropes and almost loses his balance but jumps off and hits an armdrag. Mr. Power looked pretty dumb staring at Ricky as he was on the top rope. Ricky hits a nice dive and Power hits one of his own. Ricky hits a boss enziguiri but misses the springboard dropkick. Power goes on offense but Stone Cold Ricky Marvin comes back with a Stunner and misses a nice frog splash. A few nearfalls and Ricky locks in a cross armbreaker for the win. Fun little Nitro match. Mr. Power looked fine. Ricky’s definitely on the next 25.

Let’s discuss: Black Tiger, Rey Bucanero, & Tarzan Boy vs Vampiro, Shocker, & Mr. Niebla. Rey jumps Vamp on the stage and they brawl. Sadly, this means no Shocker entrance. Rudo beatdown. Tiger attacks Shocker as he’s trying to take his pants off which RULES. Rey and Tiger hit a sorta Total Elimination on Niebla. Vamp eats a superbomb and gets pinned while Rey punches him. Can you do that? More beating in the Segunda caida until Vamp kicks Rey off the top as they go for the superbomb again in a creative spot. Niebla and Shocker crotch Tiger and Tarzan in retaliation for an earlier Niebla crotching. Then we settle down and get Shocker/Tarzan and Tiger/Niebla segments and life is good. We’ll cut to the chase as Vamp gets Rey in an armbar but won’t let go and gets DQ’d. Lame ending but it furthers the feud so it’s forgivable. Vamp challenges Rey afterwards to a hair vs. hair match. Match was quite fine, as you’d expect given these six.

Momentos Estelares: Rammstein mainly misses a senton. However, he and Super Commando hit a Buggy Bang, but we only see the replay of that. Ricky Marvin gets Volador Jr. with a cross armbreaker. Silva hits a SCARY top rope splash on Bestia and Tarzan Boy. Santo hits a tope on Blue Demon Jr. Brazo De Plata does a scary plancha on Villano 4.

Rematch of the Parejas Increibles match from last week. Big ol’ rudo beatdown to start. Wagner gets Casas with a Splash Mountain. Satanico nearly drops Santo on his head with a gourdbuster. Wagner powerbombs Santo, but they pick him up and toss him over the top to the floor for the DQ. More of the same in the segunda caida until the tecnicos finally make their comeback. Then it gets weird as Ultimo and Casas are going to ram Satanico and Wagner’s heads together, but Santo sorta cuts them off running to do a tope, and the next time we see them Satanico pins Casas and Wagner makes Ultimo submit. Tercera caida starts off with Santo getting beaten up on the ramp. Demon manages to unlace Santo’s mask, then Santo then starts a ripping on Demon. We finally settle down to a regular match and get quick Wagner/Casas and Ultimo/Satanico sequences. We’re left with Santo and Demon and soon enough Demon unmasks the legend and pins him with a small package. Not a great match but the angle is fun and the heat is super. I dig Demon’s rudo schtick but his wedgie disturbs me.

WHAT DIDN’T WORK

Opening match sees Bestia Salvaje, Scorpio Jr., Emilio Charles Jr., & Apollo Dantes vs. Gigante Silva, Rayo De Jalisco Jr., Villano 4. Apollo’s pants are AWESOME. Better than cow pants. Rudos beat up V4 and we get the always ludicrous “ref physically detains Silva on the apron spot. Rayo and Silva come in and clean house in slow motion. Rayo (AKA History’s Greatest Monster) does all his comedy spots to the Taliban. Thankfully, Apolo gets to work with V4 and it’s pretty fun. Apolo tries so very hard but gets a splash from the mascot for his troubles. Stuff happens and a Silva top rope splash seals the deal. This was as good (or not good) as you’d expect. Apolo needs to pal around with Wagner and Tiger some more.

The cavalcade of hell continues as we see Pierroth Jr., Violencia, & Zumbido vs. Gran Markus Jr., Poder Mexica, & Mascara Ano 2000. Hey, guess who was the only good thing in this match? Hint: he wears yellow pants. Zumbido’s spinning elbow in the @#%$. Markus gets whipped and gives up. Huh? Segunda caida sees Zumbido take that horribly fake looking Jerry bump. That ain’t gonna help in the next 25 voting, kid. Wow, the non-Zumbido parts are pretty peppy. Things do fall apart in the tercera caida as it’s a punch and kick fest before Violencia takes an INSANE backdrop to the floor. Everybody dives to the floor and we’re left with Markus and Pierroth again, which Gran wins in short order with a splash. Much Yelling Into The Mic™ afterwards, no doubt in regards to a hair vs. hair match. This was a lot better then you’d expect, although I can’t really label it “good.”

THERE YOU HAVE IT

Joe

(originally posted by Joe on 12/06/02)

12/1/2002 CMLL Workrate Report

Last week’s show sucked, so I won’t get into it. This one RULED for a bunch of reasons, the key one being the return of ULTIMO DRAGON.

What Worked

A weird week of firsts, including CMLL’s first ever dance number (As far as I know. I guess I shouldn’t rule it out either.). Yes, Shocker shows up to Guapo Tough Enough with some unidentifiable woman and tells the class they’re gonna dance. So we get the obligatory “wrestlers looking goofy trying to dance” bit. After a routine, the CMLL Undercard All-Stars come out and have a hearty laugh at the trainees’ expense. Not exactly subtle comedy, but comedy nonetheless and hopefully the pull apart brawl at the end leads somewhere.

One of the great joys of watching CMLL is you never know when they’re going to throw you a cureball. Like a random joshi match, fer instance. We see Mercela/Asumi Hyuga vs. Amapola/Comando Bolshoi. The primera caida (which Bolshoi and Amapola won) is cut out for whatever reason. I really know nothing about the people involved in this match but it’s still fun. Amapola in particular takes a nasty shoulder bump to the post and a Casas dive from Marcela and gets counted out, while Hyuga hits a diving knee to the back of the head to pin Bolshoi. Tercera caida sees the rudas run wild as Bolshoi hits the world’s worst 619. Marcela then pulls Bolshoi in front of an Amapola double axe-handle shot and the tecnicas take over. Bloshoi hits the SWANK~ satellite headscissors into a Fujiwara armbar. But Hyuga hits some rolling germans with verve and gets Bolshoi. She tries to go up top but gets caught by Amapola and superplexed for the elimination. Amapola poses but gets caught with a dropkick and sitout powerbomb from Marcela for the win. Good little match and fun change of pace.

ULTIMO DRAGON is back! He EATS! With Niebla and Atlantis! This RULES!

Have I mentioned Ultimo Dragon? He’s back, teaming with Atlantis and Niebla vs. Rey Buccanero/Ultimo Guerrero/Mascara Ano Dos Mil (in sherbet gear). Hey, two Ultimo’s in this match. We thankfully clip ahead to the Dragon/Guerrero showdown, and Dragon looks like he hasn’t lost a step. Atlantis comes in and hits a thousand armdrags on Ma2M and follows with a scary plancha. Niebla soon gets the Nelbina on Guerrero and Dragon applies a wacky mid-air submission on Rey for the win. Rudos run wild in the Segunda caida with Ma2M assisting in the triple teams most admirably. Mascara gets Niebla with a splash, Guerrero punches Dragon’s ticket with a wacky submission. Tecnicos get things back together in the tercera caida and everyone takes these knee destrying bumps to the floor. Except Niebla, who almost lands on his head trying a scary assisted moonsault to the floor. Dragon and Guerrero have a quick exchange in the ring and Dragon gets the win with a small package while Atlantis gets Mascara with the world’s most boring pinning combination. Not really an epic match—just a usual match that happened to have Ultimo Guerrero in it. That being it said, it was still very, very, very good.

Stellar Moments: Koreano (you got me) applies a wacky submission. Black Warrior kills Zumbido with the Bullet Tope. Lizmark gives Emilio whiplash with a superkick. HsN (we’ll miss you) hits a dive on Rammstein. Shocker lacks la Reinera on Satanico.

Loco Max gets chewed out backstage, either for cheating or getting caught. Zumbido gets an earful as well. Please, God, let this go somewhere.

Main event sees Black Tiger/Dr. Wagner/Apolo Dantes vs. Shocker/Vamp/Mascara Magica to see who gets a shot at the trios titles. My, that’s a lot of talent in the ring. Primera caida is short and chaotic as Shocker and Mascara get Wagner and Tiger with simultaneous top rope splashes. Bad guys manage to even things up with a rudo beatdown in the segunda caida. Tiger gets Mascara goes after a triple powerbomb, while Vamp gets pinned after a Tiger moonsault. Fun continues in the tercera caida as the rudos MURDER the tecnicos to start. Shocker finally turns the tide and sends Tiger and Apolo to the floor. He tries a dive but gets pulled out by Tiger. Apolo flattens him with a tope, while Mascara takes out Tiger. That leaves us with Vamp and Wagner. Vamp locks in a crossface and Wagner’s about to tap, but Rey Buccanero comes down and distracts him. While Vamp chases after Rey, Wagner hits the Wagner driver on Shocker and Tiger uses a nasty DVD on Mascara for the win. The interference was used effectively, and this was a good, heated match, although the end result was never much in doubt (with the trios champs being tecnicos and all).

What Didn’t Work

Tony Rivera takes on Loco Max in one of them there Guapo challenge matches. Max looks like Apolo Dantes kid brother. He’s also wearing this truly hideous outfit of a grey bodysuit with black trunks over it and it’s just killing me. An early cross amrbreaker attempt gives us a disturbing shot of Loco’s crotch. The match proper is a fairly uninspired affair—Loco’s greener than the grass at Augusta and Tony’s not really ready for big carry jobs yet. I watched this twice and I still don’t remember a whole lot, other than the crappy DQ ending. But the stuff with Zumbido’s own little group of rudos could be great if they follow through on it. The Guapo concept itself is fascintating, but hasn’t yielded a lot in the way of good wrestling (other than from two guys who already work for the company). Ah well. Still no idea why Tony had “Tonny” written on his ass.

El Morro has a Christmas album?

The Satanico/Damien match was fine, but why re-run it? Why not show the primera caida of the Joshi match instead? Huh?

THERE YOU HAVE IT

Joe G.