AAA Mini Line - 04/28/07 (#622)
Recapped: 04/29-05/03

I'll give in and start listing these show names. This is Reina de Reinas, obviously.

teaser: who's the new member of the Guapos? We see his silhouette and hear him talked up (ha ha ha), but no more.

This is the bullring in Hidalgo with very bad sightlines for TV; the arena is full from the word go, but you don't get a sense of it on the hard camera, because we're starting at the bullring wall instead of the crowd above it.  

Match 1: Gallego, Mr. Condor vs Chiva Rayada I, Chiva Rayada II
Plaza de Toros, Tula, Hidalgo, 03/25/07
Winner: Rudos 
Match Time: 10:39
Notes: Ref is Pepe Casas. Oh my gosh, Gallego does exist! I had some doubts. Exactly what you'd expect from these two teams; a hot opener, Chiva doing horn related spots and getting in a few dives. After II (the skinner one) wipes out Gallego with a dive, Mr. Condor counted Chiva a few times, and eventually got a big spinebuster to set up a nudo for the win.

Why do they show us a video package of everyone entering, and then we get the entrances anyway.

Match 2: Miss Janeth vs Rossy Moreno, Tiffany vs La Chola vs La Diabolica vs La Hechicera vs Mujer Demente vs Cinthia Moreno vs Fabi Apache vs Sexi Star vs Estrellita vs Joseline vs Lady Rabbit vs Lola Gonzalez vs Martha Villalobos vs Vicki Carranza in a Reina de Reinas qualifying battle royal
Plaza de Toros, Tula, Hidalgo, 03/25/07

Winner: Martha Villalobos
Match Time: 10:57
Other Match Notes: Why are they playing the Star Wars theme? I'm wildly out of order again, so this is the first time I've seen Lola Gonzalez and Vicki Carranza as evil nuns. I can only assume evil nuns, because I don't think I've ever seen a good nun in lucha libre. At least they have gimmicks now. I love this match for all the people we only see once - I'm happy to see them walk out so I can go "Hey, I remember that person!"  and then I'm happy to see them go because they're still not any good. This year, Lady Rabbit has passed on the Playboy-ish bunny outfit and is instead wearing a full body bunny outfit and has a stuffed animal bunny with her - that is so great, she needs to be a better worker or better connected so I can giggle at this more than once a year. Joseline has traded in her Indian outfit for more normal gear. She looks like Fabi Apache now, and Arturo is momentary confused. The fans pop for Martha. La Diabolica has black demon (?) wings. Mujer Demente is standing around the entrance and missing her cue. She's a crazy chef this year, and I can't imagine why. I'm pretty sure there's not an actual reason besides craziness. Cinthia Moreno's doesn't look in a good mood. Sexi Star does cartwheels. Why, I don't know. Rossy Moreno, noted ruda, slaps hands with the fans and gives the camera a big thumbs up. There's a long pause between when Tiffany enters, and when Rossy Moreno (the only one of the Brujas dressed as a Bruja) enters. She's got the belt. Piero is the ref. Oh, Fabi must've entered when we were paying attention to Tiffany. This is far more typing than I should've done already. Tiffany gets into an argument with Fabi, because she's Tiffany.

Oh, NOW I get why Mujer Demente is a chef. See, besides a chef hat she was wearing, she brought a frying pan down to the ring, and starts swatting people with it! I guess this is legal. She patting people right in the head with it, so I hope it's gimmicked. Oh, Lady Rabbit has hear normal gear under her bunny outfit, and she's not actually wrestling in the bunny outfit. That's a disappointment. Cinthia grabs the pan from Mujer Demente and gets her with it, but it keeps changing hands from there. Tiffany gets it and whacks Fabi. This is much less lame battle royal than usual with one frying pan. Lola, Vicki and Diabolica hatch a plan to whip all the tecnicas into one corner - Diabolica holds them in place, by the magic of wrestling, and moves as they whip another one to the pile - and then whip La Hechicera into the group. The tecnicas all get out of th way in time - except for Sexi Star, who was last in line. She gets squashed, but Tiffany opts to choke her rather than throw her out. For their next wacky spot, everyone starts putting on a mat headscissors on each other - they run out of room, and have to make to turns around the ring. Lady Rabbit keeps trying to add her self to the pile, but she gets shoved out of the way by someone else every time. This happens four or five times, and then both Martha and Lady Rabbit head up first. Lady Rabbit tries a senton, everyone flees, and Martha has no one one to dive on. This is amusing chaos. Next wacky spot is a triple suplex, but they really have too many free bodies around to make it work. Rossy and Cinthia try to start a headlock chain, but no one's paying attention. Martha kicks Sexi Star hard and gives him the running sit.  She's getting beat quit a bit here. Ah, now they've got it. Lady Rabbit gets the last one this time, and Martha shoulderblocks her down, causing everyone to fall down like dominos. Back to random fighting, and Mujer is first out, whipped into a Estrellita backdrop. 

Eliminations start going there, two straight people taking backdrops to the apron and being knocked form there. There's been chants for Fabi and Estrellita during the match. La Chola was supposed to throw herself out on a missed charge of Estrellita, but can't get over the rope. Estrellita tries to fix it by setting Chola on the top rope and hitting her till she goes over, but La Chola now won't - Janeth walks over and tips Chola off the ropes, and then she's gone. It takes all three Brujas to get Hechicera over the top rope. Lola gets dropkicked off the top rope, but decides to land on the apron, and safely drop down to the floor, instead of taking the actual bump. Vicki and Estrellita have a sequence, where Estrellita gets backdropped to the apron, land on the apron, and comes back in - but Piero says Estrellita is gone? Is that the rule? The fans are under the impression Estrellita is being wronged here and so is Fabi, but Estrellita leaves when forced. Well, that explains why Lola did what she did. 3 to go - 2 to go, Vicki went thru the ropes to the apron on a missed corner charge, Cinthia dropkicked her to the floor, and that's apparently good enough. Martha, who's been doing little, goes to the middle rope to squash Diabolica. Janeth stops Martha, but Diabolica climbs up to join Martha, and she's quickly shoved over. Everyone tries shoving Martha over, she fights it off by, uh, sitting and doing nothing, and they eventually get her to the apron and sweep her off from there.

Everyone stops fighting for all of two seconds, and then the Bruja decide that might as well beat up the tecnicas now. Once things settle down, Fabi and Sexi Star get along in the spirit of tecnica unity, and then Fabi suddenly remembers she hates Sexi Star. It's like "oh, yes, I remember I need to kill you now." That's broken up, so Fabi walks out, which leaves it as 3 2, so the Brujas decide to beat up the tecnicas again. It doesn't stop till everyone's split up. 

Vignette: In the gym, Alan is working out hard. Decnnis is working out hard. Billy Boy is...well, Alan is working out hard. Billy Boy is sitting in the corner and moping. He doesn't want to talk about it, but he will hold his face in his hands many times. He actually refuses to answer any questions, even when Jesus trying to give him a pep talk. Alan and Decnnis shake their heads. 

Match 3: Alan, Billy Boy (c), Decnnis vs Crazy Boy, Joe Lider (C), Psicosis II
Plaza de Toros, Tula, Hidalgo, 03/25/07
Winner: Mexican Powers
Match Time: 10:15
Notes: Billy Boy lags behind his partners and very slowly and sadly walks to the ring. He's a broken man, that's for sure. Mexican Powers are over. They've got their atomicos belts. Hmm, Atomicos would seem to mean four, but...anyway, it's started to get dark in the arena. Oh gosh, the Barrio Boys made BILLY the captain. They are morons. So, anyway, what we've got here is Alan and Decnnis having an unadvertised AAA Tag Team Tournament match (in the metaphorical sense), with Billy not really wanting to participate. Somehow, this goes okay for the Barrios early on, and, also, they think bringing in chairs is the best way to combat the Mexican Powers. Alan and Decnnis deserve Billy Boy. I wish I could root for the MPs here. Announcers drop Negro Navarro's name - it had to be in a "this is not a Negro Navarro style match" context. This is lame US indy stuff. At lest the Barrio Boys gear is looking good. Billy is so depressed, he hands on in the wrong corner. Not that you can tell, since tags aren't being made. Alan and Decnnis never give up on their friend, setting up for moves. At one point, they set up Crazy Boy for a top rope Billy splash, and so Billy climbs the ropes very slowly, and then climbs down the other side and mopes on the outside. Fans are booing Billy Boy for being a loser, and it looks like his partners have finally had enough of this. They turn to yell at Billy, which starts the comeback for the Mexican Powers. No big pop for Joe Lider hitting a big missile dropkick to get it going - actually, there was a big pop, but it was only in Lider's head, as it bounced off the mat on impact. You do a horrible missile dropkick, these things will happen. Lider holds his head the rest of the match. Billy annoys the Mexican Powers by refusing to fight and get beat up. Crazy Boy yells at him a bit, but Billy just mopes in the corner. Eventually, they just beat him up anyway. Billy actually kicks out of a cover, which is a bit ill-fitting. Barrio Boys make their own comeback - including a spot where Crazy Boy is supposed to turn around to get offense, but instead tries to start a chant for himself. Everyone but Lider and Billy end up outside, and Billy actually tries for a bit, but then changes his mind an can't bring himself to hit Lider. Billy Boy sets himself up for Lider to give him the double underhook powerbomb and that's the match.

Alan and Decnnis are ticked at Billy post match. It looks like Decnnis wants to start a fight, but Alan's playing peace makers - until they decide to both beat Billy down. I think this is supposed to be a rudo move, but I'm not sure, and the crowd doesn't really react. Sexi Star is instantly out to cover Billy up, but Alan and Decnnis throw her off and go back to beating Billy. Sexi clears house - and out comes Fabi Apache. She's not so happy, and grounds and pounds Sexi Star. The crowd thinks this is a good thing. I have no idea. Barrio Boys respond to this by posing, so it's up to security to pull the women apart. They're both escorted to the back, and as soon as they're gone, the Barrios go back to beating up Billy. I wonder if they were scared of Fabi. I sure would be, the mood she was in. And that's it. 

Noti AAA
- Konnan has a meeting with the Vipers
- The AAA wrestlers played paintball against each other. This is as weird as you might think. 

Recap: when a couple matches ago, when they had the Reina de Reinas qualifying? Just in case you forget, here's clips. 

Match 4: Tiffany vs Miss Janeth vs Rossy Moreno vs Cinthia Moreno vs Fabi Apache vs Miss Janeth in Reina de Reinas final
Plaza de Toros, Tula, Hidalgo, 03/25/07

Winner: Tiffany
Match Time: 11:13
Other Match Notes: Star enters first, Fabi enters last (w/Gran Apache, who's far more hyped about this than she is), so they don't get to brawling before the match starts. Brujas enter together, and end up taking a tecnica each to start the match. It's a six person free for all. Fabi takes a  triple faceslam, and rolls out, where Gran Apache forces her to drink water. Gran Apache is every parent who's too hyper for their children's athletic events, though I guess it is Reina de Reinas.  Brujas are working this like a normal trios beatdown, taking out Sexi Star next, and then  Cinthia by lifting her into a missile dropkick. Fabi back in for round two, and she reverses a double suplex into one of her own. Cinthia helps her out with a dropkick and leaves to dive onto her sister, but Fabi holding Janeth for Sexi to hit is just a bad idea, and it works as you'd expect. Fabi manages to step out of the way as Janeth throw herself out with a dropkick, but she wastes no time in attacking Sexy Star. Slam, middle rope moonsault, Sexy doesn't quite roll out of the way in time but we pretend she does. Crowd is dead, as it has been for really all show. Sexi with a 'rana, one two, NO. Sexi heads up - and Gran Apache throws water in her face! That's the end of her. Crowd finally reacts to something, and they do again for Fabi's pin.

Rossy in and sending Fabi out with a dropkick. Cinthia in, and you'd think the Moreno/Moreno battle would be better than it is - it's a quite stilted early on. It looks like Rossy's got the elimination with the Atlántida, and Piero seems to be signaling for it, but Cinthia escapes to an inside cradle, for two. Cinthia agonizes over the count, but keeps going, and turns a sunset flip into a long farmer's roll for the elimination. 

Tiffany argues the count, but no go. Cinthia gets a run on both Tiffany and Janeth, but Tiffany stops that, mocks the chant, and gives Cinthia a face first powerbomb. Janeth finishes her off with her move, and it's two Brujas vs Fabi. 

Crowd chants for Fabi, but she's immediately taken down by the two on one. She rallies for a double  springboard armdrag and grabs Janeth for Tiffany to hit, but Tiffany's unwilling to turn on her teammate (yet.) Fabi takes a short powerbomb, and may have hit her head. All the other women are still at ringside, and watching as Janeth accidentally tosses Fabi into a dropkick on Tiffany. Fabi grabs Janeth again, and Tiffany - well, she doesn't have to decide this time, because Janeth escapes on her own. Tiffany climbs up, as Janeth holds Fabi, and this can't go well - dropkick gets Janeth, of course. Fabi gives Tiffany a dropkick and powerbombs Janeth. Cover? No, she's picking her up one more time and saying it's it - double underhook faceslam, one two three! Gran Apache celebrates, but they got one more to go.

Crowd is behind Fabi, as much as they've been anyone so far, which is odd because they don't like Gran Apache. This is such a weird storyline. Tiffany takes back control, but Fabi slips out of a corner charges and gets a reverse rollup with back bend for two. Bodyscissors cradle one two NO, though the crowd thinks maybe. Whip, reversed, and Tiffany gets Fabi with the short powerbomb again - Tiffany really doesn't help Fabi on the move at all, she helps lifts them up and shoves them away, and hopes they might land right. Fabi is not landing right. One two - and Tiffany pulls her up? Why would you do that? In this match? That's ludicrous. Also, Tiffany's pants appear to be splitting. Corner whip, reversed, Fabi ends up backdropped to the apron, knocks Tiffany away, and lands a missile dropkick, one two NO. Whip, quick reverse into a Tiffany slap. Tiffany kicks Fabi down, and yells and Gran Apache some. Tiffany pulls Fabi around by her hair, but Fabi reveres it with an armscissors, and a fisherman's suplex, one two NO. Both Apache's can't believe it. Fabi goes for her double underhook move again, Tiffany shoves her away, Tiffany tries a clothesline, Fabi ducks under, German suplex! No bridge, that's a mistake. Fabi says she's going up. Also going up is Sexi Star, who gives Fabi a chair shot to the back. That's not good. Tiffany with an off the top rope inverted crucifix powerbomb, one two three.  

La Brujas celebrate. Gran Apache is sad, though not exactly hurting in the ring to check on his daughter. I think Janeth is happy for Tiffany, the way she's hugging her and not letting go. Gran Apache finally comes in the ring to - complain about the decision. Well, I guess he does check on Fabi eventually. All the other women wrestlers file out, and you get to figure out who's on which side - the rudas all congratulate Tiffany, the tecnicas all check on Fabi. Estrellita yells at Sexy Star, who's staying out of the ring now. Apparently Mujer Demente is now a tecnica? Fabi finally gets to her feet, and has to be held back from going after Sexy Star. Sexy would like to see that, so she gets on the apron to start more of a problem, and now everyone tells her to leave. Tiffany's not so much mad at Sexy Star as annoyed that she's stealing her spotlight. Sexy makes peace with her by raising her arm. Fabi tries to kill them both, but she's held back. They probably should get them all out of the ring before it turns into a battle royal again, and we see replays before that happens. 

Vignette: Konnan, Kenzo and Mesias are hanging out backstage, when Zorro walks by. Konnan steals Zorro's sticks in trying to get his attention for a conversation, but Zorro doesn't appear to be in the talking mood. The Legion thinks Zorro should join them, quite obviously, but Zorro doesn't appear to be interested. Or maybe he's just crazy, Ricky suggests.  

Match 5: Alan Stone, Hator, Scorpio Jr. (c), Zumbido vs Alebrije, Intocable (c), Oriental, Zorro
Plaza de Toros, Tula, Hidalgo, 03/25/07

Winner: Guapos
Match Time: 20:20
Other Match Notes: Hator is wearing a Black Warrior-ific skirt. 8 entrances takes forever. After they're done, we get one more. Scorpio talks about the enormous (Guapos illustrate "tall") newest Guapo member. It's El Guapito, a mini, looking a lot like Scorpio in a suit. Cuije immediately takes off after him. It's like tiny people can not be in the same building without fighting. Anyway, Guapos rush them, and it's a beatdown to start. It's essentially a ten man tag AND Piero's in there, so I can just skip to the finish. Comeback at 5:00 (and I'm just guessing at the start time of the match) on a missed Hator charge on Intocable. Usual tecnico showcase spots from there, and it keeps going and going, and all of it doesn't matter because it's wacky spots to end it. Guapito fouls Cuije, Alebrije goes after Guapito and gets fouled by Scorpio, Scorpio slams Guapito onto Alebrije for good measure, and that's the match. TWENTY MINUTES.

Prematch video package highlights the fact that Kenzo is hurting. I don't know why they would highlight that, but there you go. 

Match 6: Kenzo Suzuki vs Cibernetico vs La Parka Jr., in a three way bull terrier match
Plaza de Toros, Tula, Hidalgo, 03/25/07

Winner: Kenzo
Match Time: 5:00
Other Match Notes: Parka is wearing a black mask for whatever reason. No one really wants to put on the neck brace for the chain. After the last match got TWENTY MINUTES, this one starts at 9 to the hour. La Parka and Cibernetico at first decide to sit out while the other is fighting and Kenzo gets a good run. Tecnicos forge an uneasy truce to work together on Kenzo. Crowd is cheering Parka more. Kenzo gets dropped, and Cibernetico and Parka both size each other up, but don't do anything. Cibernetico literally yanks Parka's chain when Parka seems to be touching corners to win the match, but they get over it. One of them AAA Walls is slide in the ring by someone, and Cibernetico set sit up in the corner. Crowd is not very into this, but what do you expect? It's two tecnicos beating up a rudo. Parka holds Kenzo while standing in front of the breakable wall, and I can not think of a worse idea. Sure enough, Cibernetico ends up spearing Parka into the wall by accident. Those things do break part good. Cibernetico ends up with the chain wrapped around his neck, and his entangle himself before he can get back up. And then he leaves - did he unhook the chain? Yea, he must've taken it off there. He brings in chairs, and goes to powerbomb Kenzo on them, but Parka returns to break that up and drop Cibernetico. No pop at all. Parka legdrops Ciber onto the chair, and the crowd is cool with that. Parka and Cibernetico scuffle on the mat, while Kenzo tags the corners. Parka finally realizes what's up at 5.5, but he's too late. Kenzo wins, walks off, and no one cares.

Cibernetico and Parka go back to rolling around on the mat, as the ring crew takes the wall remnants out of there. Kenzo wanders around ringside. Four security guys come out to break it up, and somehow that actually works. Cibernetico leaves first (because they play his music). Video replays, with Tiffany's win at the end, and we're done.