quips report to spring training

to me, it’s not baseball season until Carlos starts being quotable.

Zambrano looks forward to opening day

“The one who invented the light [bulb] tried 2,000-something times, and he finally did it,” Zambrano said. “We have light because somebody thought about doing that. … I don’t want to spend 2,000-some times to win the first game on Opening Day, but I will do it this year and go from there.”

Fukudome in the house (note the first official 2008 appearance of Paul Sullivan snark)

Kosuke Fukudome was welcomed to the Cubs clubhouse Friday morning by wacky pitcher Carlos Zambrano, who was wearing a jersey with Fukudome’s number 1 after slipping a No. 11 jersey into the Japanese star’s locker.

Zambrano told Fukudome that the pitcher was “the real No. 1,” though in reality, we all know Zambrano is only No. 1 in walks allowed and punches thrown at teammates.

Eventually, Zambrano took off the jersey and handed it to Fukudome, who quickly learned he had been Punk’d. Fukudome smiled all the way through the prank, as the Japanese media horde, along with several Chicago TV stations, recorded every second.

Santana’s trade to the Mets may mean Z is no longer the best Venezuelan pitcher in the NL, but he’s got a tight grip on most insane. This should be a fun season.

Anyway, I wouldn’t actually mind Fukudome third, especially with the Roberts trade stalled. You could do something like this

1) Soriano (assuming he’s stuck there)
2) Lee (OBP!)
3) Kosuke
4) A RAM
5) DeRosa
6) Soto
7) Theriot
8) Pie

It doens’t matter if Theriot doesn’t return to early season form or Pie bounces back, because they’re not making outs between the best guys. If Brian Roberts ever did become a Cub, I’d put him second, Lee 4th, and slide everyone else down a spot. I’m not thinking too much about that deal, though, because it seems totally stalled.

Reality is Soriano, Theriot or DeRosa, Lee, Ram, Kosuke, Soto, DeRosa or Theriot, Pie as the opening day lineup, but it’s nice that Kosuke wants to bat third.

(The Dempster thing was totally overblown. How dare an athlete – or whatever Ryan is – suggest his group is going to succeed.)